Should Dads Massage Their Babies?

Why is it so important for dads to spend time with their babies in those early weeks

and months - how does it create that bond? Can baby massage for Dads help?

And if they don’t do that in the early stages, what are the potential implications

further down the line? 

A tender moment as a father gently plays with his baby, sharing smiles and love.

Over a million connections are made in the brain every second in the first 3 years of

life. Early experiences shape the developing brain and lay the foundations for

positive social, emotional and cognitive health. These connections can be formed

from the simplest activities; eye-contact, vocalisation, nurturing touch, listening and

responding to babies’ needs. Human connection.

And if you think it all needs to come from mum you’re wrong! Recent research has

challenged a long-term perception that it was only the mother that was naturally

attuned to their new-born infant, and that for fathers this would be a learned

behaviour. We now know that there are physical changes that take place in a father’s

biology to help him adapt to his new family. It has even been evidenced that dads’

brains grow in areas that are responsible for caregiving, affection, organisation and

problem solving, suggesting that both parents play a key part in a baby’s

development.

A proud father cradles his baby close, showcasing their special bond and his protective embrace.

So what’s actually happening to dad?... Hormonal changes can take place from the

last months of pregnancy to support this transition, for example the hormone

prolactin, known as the caregiving hormone, increases, which can assist fathers in

being more responsive to their babies. Likewise, an increase in the hormone

oxytocin helps dad and baby to fall in love, bond, and increases his desire to interact

and play. At the same time, levels of testosterone decrease, which researchers

believe can encourage dads to better focus on their family and relationships and be

more connected to their babies. It is even shown that parents who co-habit during

pregnancy have hormonal synchronicity, with similar levels of oxytocin in their blood,

believed to assist as a coping mechanism for adjusting to life with a new baby and

promoting togetherness.

The early weeks are a vital time for dads to be involved, both to support the mother

and the family unit, yet only 1 in 5 eligible dads in the UK take their entitled paternity

leave, many citing that the statutory offer is simply not enough.

A proud dad lovingly cradles his newborn twins, capturing a heartfelt moment of joy and tenderness.

Bonding is a process, not a moment, whilst it’s never too late to foster bonds, the

more that fathers can interact, and the earlier the interaction, the better the result.

There are so many ways that fathers can bond with their babies; through touch (such

as skin to skin and massage), talking and singing, dancing, playing games like peek-

a-boo, rocking, soothing, baby-wearing and bathing. The time fathers can invest in

this relationship should not be underestimated. Remember those neural

connections? They are laying the foundations for future emotional and intellectual

intelligence, future positive relationships, behaviour, communication and ability to

regulate stress.

And if you still need convincing, you won’t believe this. Brain scans have

demonstrated how the brain ‘lights up’ when parents look at their baby, we are wired

differently. In a mother’s brain the part of the brain that responds is responsible for

nurturing, love and affection, and protection, whereas with fathers, it’s the part of the

brain that’s responsible for ‘thinking behaviour’, spatial awareness and language.

This is thought to be why mum may exhibit more nurturing behaviours for bonding,

and dad more physical play. They are both beneficial for the developing brain.

What’s clear is that we need to value fathers and their important role in nurturing the

future.

Massage your babies! Crystal

References:

Ruth Feldman et al, Natural variations in maternal and paternal care are associated with systematic

changes in oxytocin following parent–infant contact,

Psychoneuroendocrinology, Volume 35, Issue 8, 2010

Abraham E, Hendler T, Shapira-Lichter I, Kanat-Maymon Y, Zagoory-Sharon O, Feldman R. Father's

brain is sensitive to childcare experiences. Proc Natl Acad Sci U S A. 2014 Jul 8;111(27):9792-7. doi:

10.1073/pnas.1402569111. Epub 2014 May 27.

Shir Atzil, Talma Hendler, Orna Zagoory-Sharon, Yonatan Winetraub, Ruth Feldman,

Synchrony and Specificity in the Maternal and the Paternal Brain: Relations to Oxytocin and

Vasopressin,

Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry,

Volume 51, Issue 8, 2012,

The Life of Dad: The Making of a Modern Father. Dr Anna Machin. Simon and Schuster, 2018

Report: Paternity leave, gender equality and the UK economy. CPP, Pregnant Then Screwed (PTS)

and Women in Data. 15 June 2023